Post by Kordarus on Jul 29, 2017 12:53:55 GMT -6
MY ARSE IS FREEZING!!! 1 vs Petrified Wood Elves 1
Taifeather of MY ARSE IS FREEZING!!! scored a Touchdown
Furry Butt of MY ARSE IS FREEZING!!! killed Poludnie of the Petrified Wood Elves
Tuchus of MY ARSE IS FREEZING!!! will miss next game because of a Groin Strain (MNG)
Celeborn of Petrified Wood Elves scored a Touchdown
Galadriel of Petrified Wood Elves Killed Cheeks
Polnoc of Petrified Wood Elves injured 2 players
The third match in the Khemri team's glorious quest to end every game with a 1-1 tie began with their receiving the ball. Legolas, for once, picked up with ease. "When the Thro-Ra is competent, it never bodes well", muttered the Norse coach. He instructed his rowdies to bum-rush the towering Tomb Guardians. Keister stunned one with a well-timed ass-ault, but was sent off for fouling. While the melee occupied everyone, Legolas made a perfect pass to Celeborn, who arrived at the Freezling's goal line unmolested and rather well-protected behind a defensive wall. "I think I'll just hang out here a while", he said as he picked his fleshless nose-holes. However, after just one turn of spectating the carnage and listening to the approaching howls of werewolves and berserkers, his courage wavered and he backed into the zone with a stumble. 1-0 to the dead elves.
The kick went wide, and the Norse receiver was handed the ball on a touchback. But as upsetting as this seemed, nothing prepared the Khemri for the next set-back: Furrybutt knocked down and KILLED a Tomb Guardian! A unison howl sundered the stunned silence of the crowd as the Tomb Guardian, Poludnie, failed to regenerate and turned into a musty pile of rags and bones, later quietly sold to a travelling rag-and-bone man for the manufacture of glue and parchment. The rage at the loss of their team-mate spurred the elves to knock the Norse ball-carrier out of bounds, but the inaccurate throw-in of the lost ball landed it just where the Norse coach wanted it -- in the Khemri TD zone. The tide of scantily-clad barbarians scrambled toward it, and a Skeleton was killed, but then immediately felt better again. A Khemri blitzer then killed a viking in retaliation! The poor lad, named Cheeks, had already had an ankle smashed in a previous game, and his coach coldly ordered his apothecary to stand back and let him die. "They kill lame horses, don't they?" -- and like a horse, Cheeks too was sent off to the glue peddler.
Every injury so far this game has been a death. As all pondered this solemnly, the whistle blew half-time without an equalizer.
During the short break, some Khemri fans prepared a surprise for the murderer of their Tomb Guardian, stunning him with a large rock. Nevertheless, the Norse felt rather well as Tai "The L is silent and also invisible" Feather picked up the ball and advanced inside a cage. The Khemri wrecked it a bit, injuring one Norse lineman, and stunning almost everybody else -- with the exception of Taifeather, alas, who trundles away and scores. 1-1.
There are only 2 Tomb Guardians on the field, and a lowly unskilled Norse lineman, Rumpus, blitzes through the thinned scrimmage line, stuns a skeleton, dodges other defenders and picks up the ball the Khemri were just getting ready to carry. He is, as a result, completely surrounded with nowhere to run, and is quickly stunned in turn. But this display of dauntless athleticism inspires the Thro-Ra to grab the ball, run up to an advanced Blitz-Ra in a scoring position, and throw the ball with a mighty heave way over his head! This is impressively stupid, but ensures the game ends with, you guessed it, another 1-1 tie.
Taifeather of MY ARSE IS FREEZING!!! scored a Touchdown
Furry Butt of MY ARSE IS FREEZING!!! killed Poludnie of the Petrified Wood Elves
Tuchus of MY ARSE IS FREEZING!!! will miss next game because of a Groin Strain (MNG)
Celeborn of Petrified Wood Elves scored a Touchdown
Galadriel of Petrified Wood Elves Killed Cheeks
Polnoc of Petrified Wood Elves injured 2 players
The third match in the Khemri team's glorious quest to end every game with a 1-1 tie began with their receiving the ball. Legolas, for once, picked up with ease. "When the Thro-Ra is competent, it never bodes well", muttered the Norse coach. He instructed his rowdies to bum-rush the towering Tomb Guardians. Keister stunned one with a well-timed ass-ault, but was sent off for fouling. While the melee occupied everyone, Legolas made a perfect pass to Celeborn, who arrived at the Freezling's goal line unmolested and rather well-protected behind a defensive wall. "I think I'll just hang out here a while", he said as he picked his fleshless nose-holes. However, after just one turn of spectating the carnage and listening to the approaching howls of werewolves and berserkers, his courage wavered and he backed into the zone with a stumble. 1-0 to the dead elves.
The kick went wide, and the Norse receiver was handed the ball on a touchback. But as upsetting as this seemed, nothing prepared the Khemri for the next set-back: Furrybutt knocked down and KILLED a Tomb Guardian! A unison howl sundered the stunned silence of the crowd as the Tomb Guardian, Poludnie, failed to regenerate and turned into a musty pile of rags and bones, later quietly sold to a travelling rag-and-bone man for the manufacture of glue and parchment. The rage at the loss of their team-mate spurred the elves to knock the Norse ball-carrier out of bounds, but the inaccurate throw-in of the lost ball landed it just where the Norse coach wanted it -- in the Khemri TD zone. The tide of scantily-clad barbarians scrambled toward it, and a Skeleton was killed, but then immediately felt better again. A Khemri blitzer then killed a viking in retaliation! The poor lad, named Cheeks, had already had an ankle smashed in a previous game, and his coach coldly ordered his apothecary to stand back and let him die. "They kill lame horses, don't they?" -- and like a horse, Cheeks too was sent off to the glue peddler.
Every injury so far this game has been a death. As all pondered this solemnly, the whistle blew half-time without an equalizer.
During the short break, some Khemri fans prepared a surprise for the murderer of their Tomb Guardian, stunning him with a large rock. Nevertheless, the Norse felt rather well as Tai "The L is silent and also invisible" Feather picked up the ball and advanced inside a cage. The Khemri wrecked it a bit, injuring one Norse lineman, and stunning almost everybody else -- with the exception of Taifeather, alas, who trundles away and scores. 1-1.
There are only 2 Tomb Guardians on the field, and a lowly unskilled Norse lineman, Rumpus, blitzes through the thinned scrimmage line, stuns a skeleton, dodges other defenders and picks up the ball the Khemri were just getting ready to carry. He is, as a result, completely surrounded with nowhere to run, and is quickly stunned in turn. But this display of dauntless athleticism inspires the Thro-Ra to grab the ball, run up to an advanced Blitz-Ra in a scoring position, and throw the ball with a mighty heave way over his head! This is impressively stupid, but ensures the game ends with, you guessed it, another 1-1 tie.