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Post by peglegpete on Apr 9, 2018 22:47:38 GMT -6
"Guys, guys, listen up. We have a lot to do before we meet with our new owner Peg Leg Pete." Falco Cotton states seriously.
"If we want to play Blood Bowl then this is the only way left to us, and I for one do not wish to go quietly into the night."
Two rather large Halflings sporting orange beards and mo-hawks begin butting heads and growling at each other. "Odo, Otho, stop it. We have a treeman we still need to buil...er, hire for the team." The two Large Halflings don't pay the speaker any heed. Falco approaches them and relieves them of their beer steins.
"Oi, wat givs!"
"Let me tell you what gives Odo and Otho."
"Oi, don' be callin' us dat or we will..."
With a cold glare in his eyes, Falco stares down the two. "What?!" Looking each in his eyes Falco states, "Would you rather I call you Tomato and Carrot?"
Settling down the two state in unison, "No."
Falco softens a hair, "We all agreed to this. So lets make the best of it." The two nod and grumble an okay to their team captain. "Good that's more like it. We only have a few more weeks before the season starts. So how is that Death Roller coming along? Is it starting to look like a treeman?"
Fosco Peason stands up. He is covered in grease and tree leaves. "We have several branches and some leaves glued to the body of the machine, but I don't know if it will be ready in time for the first match. I can say that we have made some progress."
That's disappointing. So how about our gear and uniforms. Will we look Flingy enough?"
Toob Twinkleoes stands, "That will depend on how much ale the fans will drink. However, it shouldn't be a problem as the fans tend be slobber knockered before the first kick off."
"That is something. We have a little time lads. So let's not be idle about it."
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Post by peglegpete on Apr 15, 2018 4:59:55 GMT -6
Back in his office....
A Dark Elf woman was busy looking hot while talking over the foneball. "Look Mr. Zugg, you and a few of your old teammates, like that Oberwald guy, or whatever his name was, are welcome to play in the league. You know, sign on as a so called star player, but frankly, we don't want any old washed up teams trying to relive their glory years. Look, I know how hard it is to let go of something important, but you need to move on. Maybe sign on as ref for a season or two, or at least until someone signs you on for a match. No. I am not going to put you through to Pete. He's a busy guy. Yes I am well aware of how far back the two of you go. I am also aware that when he tried out for Reikland he was told to get lost, which forced him into starting this league. So that's why I am being as accommodating with you as I am. Now if there is nothing else I have calls waiting."
She terminates the call and puts the next on the ball. "Pete's office, Jan speaking. To whom am I speaking?"
A round bearded face appears on the ball. "Hi Jan, this Toob Twinkletoes. I am calling to verify that my meeting with Pete is still on for tomorrow at 11 am."
Jan pulls out an appointment book and thumbs through it for a second. "Yes M. Twinkletoes. Everything is ready for your meeting. Let me say this. I have never seen such a promising Halfling team in my entire career in Blood Bowl. Pete and I are looking forward to meeting you and the then the team. Will there be anything else that I can assist you with?"
Smiling Toob replies,"No Jan. Falco and are looking forward to meeting the two of you as well. Thanks for your time."
Toob's image disappears and Jan gets up and saunters into Pete's office. "Hey Pete, do you have a minute? I have some concerns about our meeting with the reps for the Huge Halflings tomorrow."
Pete looks up from his stats page on the Huge Halflings. "Yeah? Whats on your mind?"
"For starters, I don't think that they are Halflings. This Toob guy looks like a Dwarf and his politeness sounded stiff and maybe even forced. I feel that we should take a pass on this team, or even better...destroy them."
Pete chuckles, "Jan, Jan, Jan, There is no way that a Dwarf team would ever try to disguise themselves as a Halfling team. What are they gonna do, glues tree limbs onto their death roller to pass it off as a treeman? Let's try to keep an open mind. We will meet this Toob guy tomorrow and see what he has in mind. Think about it. If, these Halflings are the real thing and they manage to win the CRIPPLED Cup under my tutelage. Just think about the publicity it will generate. All sorts of teams will come thinking that this is some weak league, but then will learn what real Blood Bowl is. Plus, you and me will become famous for leading the first Halfling team to a Cup in any tournament other than an all stunty circus tourney. You with me?"
"You know I am Pete, but if they are not legit then I am going to crush their little hearts. I mean it! Their literal hearts will be ripped out of their chests and crushed under my heal."
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Post by peglegpete on May 1, 2018 8:26:38 GMT -6
Jan pokes her head into Pete's office. She is wearing her old team jersey, the White Hall Warriors. Her long white hair slides down over her should slightly hiding her face from Pete's eyes. He becomes completely distracted by her as he tries to tamp a stack of papers unsuccessfully. "Pete, your 9 am is here. I have conference room 3 prepared for us."
"Uhhh...hmmm...right, my 9 am. Are you my 9 am?"
"Don't be daft Pete. Toob Twinkletoes and Falco whatever are sitting in there now. So get your aging butt in there and decide whether we want them or not." She says as she strides over to his desk. "And by the way, they are huge; the biggest Halflings that I have ever seen. So come on."
Pete offers his arm to Jan as they exit his office together. Pete looks over at Jan as they enter the conference room. His excitement is palpable. "Hello Toob, Falco." He states as nods to each of the very large Halflings. "We have a few things to discuss with you before I purchase your team and turn them loose on C.R.I.P.P.L.E.D. It is nice to finally confirm what you have been telling me concerning your size. You two are nearly the size of very stout Dwarves. Where did you say that you were from?"
Toob sits up a little straighter. He smiles at Pete through his clean shaven face and short brown bowl cut hair. "Ummm. We are from an out of the way community called, err..." Toob looks desperately around for anything to help get him off the hook. Looking over Pete's shoulder he spots the foothills to the Northeast of Tobarro Bay. With confidnce he continues,"Hillshire. We aren't all this large so we bigguns as we are called by our kinfolk do what we can to help support our families back home."
Pete perks up, "Hillshire huh? I haven't ever heard of it. What do you guys do out that way?"
Falco smiles as he speaks up, "Really? I'm surprised that you have never heard of Hillshire Farms. We do a brisk bit of business selling smoked sausages. As well as we do in the sausage trade it still isn't enough though. So here we are."
"And you guys have a Treeman?"
Toob and Falco speak at the same time, "We sure do."
Toob looks at Falco for a second and then continues,"He is an old gnarled Oak. He dates back to before Blood Bowl and fought in the Highland Wars where he was injured severely. So some Dwarven Artificers took pity on him and built a sort of mechanical suit to support his trunk. Our town has been caring for old Digger for generations. It was his idea to see about joining your league to raise money for our families."
Jan look over at Pete, "Give us a moment guys. We need to talk in private. Come on Pete." She pulls him up by the arm and leads him out of the room. "You're not buying this are you. Dwarves taking pity? Be for real. At least say it was something believable, like...like...I don't know. Dark Elves would have used him firewood, the High Elves would have just walked by him, the Wood Elves would have used wood to fix him up, and the Elven Union? Those morons couldn't mend a tree let alone a Treeman. Come on Pete, let me grind their lil' hearts under my heel." She is beaming with absolute malevolent joy as she demonstrates the grinding of hr right heel.
Pete motions with his hands for her to calm down. "Now, now Jan. Their story is tragic, but hopeful, compelling even. Plus I want to see what they have come up with for their Treeman." Rubbing his chin he states. "You know what I can't believe?"
"What's that dearest?"
"They shaved their faces and cut their hair." Pete gets a far away look in his eyes. "They must be in some serious trouble to take things this far. I want to help them while making them pay dearly for the subterfuge."
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Post by peglegpete on Jun 7, 2018 0:20:57 GMT -6
Peg Leg Pete sighs as he rubs the aching nub of his right leg. Jan comes up behind him and begins to rub his massive shoulders. "What's on your mind Pete?"
"It's my new team. I could have sworn that they were Dwarves trying to disguise themselves as Halfling. I mean, they're big enough, but they play like any Halfling team.How many of those stunty pipsqueaks did we have to bury those first two matches? Maybe...hmmm." Pete stares straight ahead grunting at the thoughts running around in his head.
Jan climbs up into his lap. "No Pete, I know those grunts. You aren't getting the old team back together. Rodrigo is the only one left in good enough shape to still play."
Pete looks her in the eye."Then tell me, what am I supposed to do Jan? We need a winner and I am out of ideas. Me and the guys were some of the best to ever set foot on the pitch."
Jan gives him a soft kiss and stands up wringing her hands nervously. "I know how good you guys were. The Tobarro Bay Buccaneers are legendary, but before you get the old men back together I want you to know that you aren't alone. We are a team. I left Nagaroth to be with you. My family scorned me, but since we have built this incredible league the Dark Elves have taken notice."
Pete stands up turning her around holding her from behind. "I know a couple of trash teams have been sent to us, but no serious contenders as of yet. I mean, the high Elves, Wood Elves, and the Elven Union have all sent teams that were viable contenders." Somewhere in the back of Pete's large bald head a dim light shines. "Wait a second! You know something?"
She smiles as she squirms around to face him."I do know something. I received a letter from my youngest sister. She says that the Nightmares may be sending their Farm league team, the White Hall Warriors. The rumor is that the owners of the Nightmares want to send us the Nightmares, but can't locate their players. So they decided to send the Warriors in their stead. Plus my sister plays for them."
An odd look comes over Pete's face. It is reminiscent of what a smile may look like on Pete's face. "We should probably keep this to ourselves until we know for sure if they are joining us this up-coming season."
"Oh my husband, when will you learn to leave things to me? You let me worry about the details of getting them here and you work out a stratagem to make them the contenders we need them to be. What do you say? I hope it will be yes, because they will be arriving tomorrow."
"I suppose they can have the Vampires old castle."
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